Why You Find it Difficult to Change & What to do About It!
They say Change is the only constant in life. As true as that statement is, a truer statement is that, almost everyone in the world finds it difficult to change. Yes, we all want to live better lives and make better decisions – but for some reason, we don’t seem to do what that requires. It’s like wanting to pass an exam but refusing to read or attend classes. It’s Self-sabotage!
But think about this – the hard thing about change is not the thing you’re trying to change or the circumstances surrounding that change. It’s the way you view it.
Most times, when we decide to change or are faced with a situation that calls for change, our default thinking is negative. Most times, we see the change as ‘hard’ or ‘too difficult before we even figure out what the change requires. It’s almost as though our bodies go into fight or flight mode, and we often choose flight.
Before you start to beat yourself up about this, know that it’s not your fault. Our brains are designed to keep us safe – a job it does very well…maybe too well. Once you introduce a foreign activity, concept or idea into your routine that seems to conjure negative thoughts or thinking, your brain reacts. You end up talking yourself out of it, choosing an easier path or just not doing it at all.
A great example here is exercise. If you view exercise in a negative light, every time it’s time to work out, you will be reluctant. The solution? See exercise in a different light. Instead of looking at it negatively, change the way you see it. Instead, look at exercise as the key to living a better life, looking good, or relieving stress. The moment you start to look at it positively, your brain will be more accepting and even help you get through it better.
This goes for every other change in your life. Stop looking at that change like Mount Everest that’s terrifying to climb. Instead, look at it like the biggest adventure of your life. Something you desire to conquer and will give you a great sense of fulfilment. The more positive you are about that change, the easier it becomes. You’ll start to see many ways to achieve it and the task becomes fun and endearing. All it takes is changing how you see it.
To achieve this, you can do simple things like;
- Change the way you talk about it. Use positive words to describe it every time you speak about it to anyone, even yourself.
- Look for the good in it. Every change has some good in it – find it and dwell on it till that’s all you see and desire.
- Know that it’s not that hard. Everything you do with ease today had a hard start – from learning to write in school to performing tasks at your job. Start with a step and before you know it you’ll be running.
- Don’t be hard on yourself. Making a change can be tasking, but it is always for the best. If you make a mistake, know that you can always start again and do better next time.
- You’re not alone. It’s easy to think that you are the only one going through this change, but there’s nothing new under the sun. Find communities (online or offline) that offer support for the change you’re trying to make and read success stories. You will see things differently after.
We hope this article has been helpful. Have a wonderful experience taking charge of the changes you desire!
Photo by Etty Fidele on Unsplash
