Chick Chat With Cornelia O’Dwyer: How Do You Take to Unannounced Visitors?

September 29, 2015

How do you take to unannounced visitors?

Are you over protective of your home or are you the easy going type with house guests?

For some people, their home is their sanctuary whilst for some it’s an open door to all and sundry.

A follower wrote in:

I’m 33, newly married and just adjusting to the new living dynamics. My hubby tends to have friends and family who come to the house every now and then. He is very open and friendly. I’m friendly but I like drawing boundaries. All my friends call before they visit me. Most of his don’t. My sister-in-law showed up at our house unannounced the other day & she got offended because the security guards to our building wouldn’t let her in regardless of who she said she was. They are new guards and they didn’t recognize her. I was sleeping and by the time I could be bothered to reach for my cell phone, I realized I had 11 missed calls all from my sister-in law who had been held at my gate. She did not let me know she was coming and it appears she didn’t feel she needed to. She came in with an attitude raking about being outside the gate for 20 minutes and luckily for her, my maid who was going out the gate recognized her. She had stopped by to see “us” but I know it was really her brother she was here to see. I had terrible cramps and just couldn’t fake pretend that day.

Who let this lady in?!!

She has killed my Zen. She asked for tea but we had run out of sugar and it was an empty fridge kind of day. She is about 6 years older than me so I said to her very nicely “Sis, I’m sorry I didn’t know you were coming, I would have made sure I stocked up. I can quickly send for some sugar and breakfast items now, it won’t take long”. She then passed a snide remark: “Do I have to make an announcement before you stock up” then she laughed it off. I hinted to my hubby about his sister not calling in advance hoping he would get the message but he is casual about unannounced guests and had little to say. I on the other hand prefer to enforce a no unannounced guest policy but is this wise battle? Shouldn’t we be on the same page about houseguests or am I being funny?

How can one keep their home sacred if their spouse is the opposite? What is the best way to ward off unexpected guests? Should one from the beginning tactfully guard their territory or do strict house rules work against you?

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