Chick Chat With Connie Girl: My Friend’s Husband Keeps Asking Me Sexually Inappropriate Questions! What Should I Do?
Men with no filter
Hey Guys, it’s #ChickChat.
One of my pet peeves is a guy who has no filter. Whilst we all should generally work on our filter, I find it a huge turn off when a man talks carelessly.
I have a vendor at work I have to relate with. I am into procurement so I get ambushed with all sorts. The only difference with this vendor is that he is my very good friends husband. He runs a travel agency and my company uses them to book all corporate flights. He offers reasonable rates but he is the most obnoxious individual. I never liked him but here we are. The other day he called me to verify if a payment had been made and out of no where he asked me “What’s your shirt size” I was taken aback and said, I think it’s an inappropriate question and that I had a meeting and needed to go. He goes further to say he has not asked me for my bra size and that would be inappropriate and I should not be so uptight. I damned him and said I’m a married woman I don’t think that’s any of your concern. I am well endowed so I couldn’t think of any other reason this guy would want to know my shirt size except him being a pervert! So you don’t think I’m jumping to conclusions, this is not the first time he has thrown out random loose talk. One day we were all gisting at a party, my friend had gone to the rest room. I was wearing skinny jeans and a casual top and after I came off the dance floor he said “you do a good job keeping fit I think you have the perfect thigh-to-hip-ratio great moves and stamina there”. I don’t give him words so I found a way to leave and mingle with others. I don’t know but I find his comments are always about my body parts and when I trace these “compliments” and when he says them my friend is never there. We used to go to the same gym and he came up to me and said “I thought your boobs were way bigger than the actually are”
What do you do when you don’t quite have evidence about levels of inappropriateness? I called a guy friend and asked if he would compliment his wife’s friend about her body parts and he said “the fact is he is not trying to date you, he is only complimenting you so don’t bother creating an enemy by telling your friend”. I know women can get very defensive but I’m thinking of dropping him as a vendor at my company so I limit my interaction with him but my guy friend thinks that’s too drastic and I must find a way to work it out and why would I want to cut off my friend’s “bread and butter”.
The guy is arrogant and I see him twisting the story so it’s easier for me to drop him as a vendor. I’m not a confrontational person so I just don’t know how to be harsh. Is that the right thing to do? I certainly don’t want to bother telling my friend or should I?