“He is the one for me“. “I think I found the one“. “He’s the one I’ve been waiting for all my life” – almost every romantic movie or wedding vow centres on the idea of “The One”. The idea that there is one person for each and every one of us. From movies like ‘How Harry met Sally’ to TV ads, we are made to believe that there is just one person who is your perfect match. But how true is this?
Fairytales are nice to watch and read, and sometimes help us cope with what is in anticipation of what could be. However, the theme of “The One” that most fairytales peddle a story that can leave us with more or less than a bitter taste in our mouths.
Let’s take a look at marriages today for example. There are tons of wedding bells ringing every weekend with men and women pledging unending love to each other. Beautiful to watch. But on the flip side, there is a dangerously high-rising rate of divorce and separation that causes those wedding bells to come crashing down. Marriages are ending rapidly and it causes me to ask – does this mean they picked the wrong “The One”? Did they feed off of the ‘fluff’ that make the honeymoon stage of the relationship and think it would carry them for a lifetime? Or did they decide on one person and mentally conform them into being their heart’s desire – “The One”.
Beyond marriage, there is the issue of feminism. Not the actual feminism where women fight for equal rights and equal pay, but the misconstrued notion that women don’t need men. With more women choosing to become single mothers or not become mothers or wives in total, I’d like to believe this changes things. The “The one-o-Meter” has to be malfunctioning. If a woman decides not to get married to who is “supposed” to be her “The One”, won’t he end up getting married to someone else? Can the title of “The One” be given and taken away at a moment’s notice?
I once spent 30 minutes listening to someone explain why there can’t possibly be one person for each of us and how “the one” was designed to make women feel more special than they actually are. Needless to say that after that statement he lost me…but he kind of had a point. Did we make up “the one” to make people feel special? Like out of all the billions of people in the world, the universe pulled our chi flows together and we have met like it was foretold by wise old ones? Or is there actually something we’re missing and one person somewhere, a long time ago, married the wrong “the one” and screwed it all up for the rest of us.
What do you think?